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My Diary Stuff
My Reads Me:
 You are Beauty. You are beautiful, whether it be on the inside, the outside, or both. People are drawn to you as strongly as you are drawn to the beauty in the world around you. What Emotion Are You? brought to you by Quizilla |
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2003-03-12 - 10:05 p.m. Work is going ok I guess. No major dramas on my part - as in big mistakes or anything... or not that I am aware of. I am feeling very up and down at the moment. I feel weepy. I am just really burned out from work. I haven't been sleeping properly the past few nights - even though I have had to go to work. I have also been suffering from a blocked sinus-type virus which has made work and trying to sleep even worse. Yesterday afternoon/evening/night I had the most awful migraine which would not go away. I have been back on painkillers again because of having to work, although I haven't told my mom this because I don't want to make her angry or scared. This morning I was at work only just on time because I was really late getting out of bed. My legs and body just refused to co-operate in getting up and moving... even when I did manage to lunge out of bed I managed to fumble and take twice or three times as long to do everything as I normally would. This was proved to me in the fact that my mom was actually ready before me - I don't think this has ever happened before in my lifetime! Tomorrow is my day off. Thank God. I doubt I will be out of bed - maybe just to go wash or something. My mom is going to visit our family friend and I really wish I could go - in fact not going makes me want to cry because I love visiting her and she is like an auntie or something to me. I blocked most people on msn messenger yesterday. I can't deal with people at the moment. I only have about 5 people on there who are not blocked. I wish that I didn't go on there today. I am really sad at being ill all the time. I don't remember what it feels like to not have M.E. and my other health problems... I just wish I could go back to being 'normal'. I have no idea what I am going to do with my life. I will never be able to leave home at this rate. I am sorry.. I know there's lots of people dying and way worse off than me.. maybe I am just a really nasty, spoilt person? I didn't mean for this to be so depressing and one big rant. I can't talk to anyone about this - I don't wanna talk to my mom about it and my bf doesn't understand and there's no way I can talk to my friends about it... so am just letting it out here. Am gonna shut up now. |
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