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My Diary Stuff
My Reads Me:
 You are Beauty. You are beautiful, whether it be on the inside, the outside, or both. People are drawn to you as strongly as you are drawn to the beauty in the world around you. What Emotion Are You? brought to you by Quizilla |
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2003-02-21 - 7:32 p.m. I'm very sick. - well more sick than normal... fellow M.E.-ers will know what I mean cos that doesn't make much sense! I hate this - I wonder whether I am paying for the fact I went to London and did that course? I spent all day in bed pretty much. I look Phantom of the Opera-ish and mom (who has a virus) was really worried about me. I have to say my mom is one in a million... even when she is nearly dying... she still brings me a cup of tea and this afternoon she came and sat in my room to keep me company and read me some 'Words of Wisdom' - which are wise/inspirational quotes - to cheer me up. I finally summed up enough energy and took a shower and whilst doing this I was thinking about how great she is... I got so emotional thinking about this that I burst into tears! I must write about my Networking Course... ok so I was really anxious and nervous about this. I kept imagining the worst... but as I later on said to my mom and friend... the worst was not bad enough... Basically the course was impossible. It wasn't aimed at beginners, even though it had been billed as that in the college brochure. When I arrived, I found out that I was the only person taking the course - normally there are about 5 students. Plus the guy teaching me was foreign - Czech - and spoke with a dodgy accent. Half the time I was unsure of what he was saying - like he said white... meaning wide (he pronounced ds as ts). He was shocked to find out that I had never done a computer course before and even more shocked to find that I didn't have a clue about anything to do with hardware and maths!!! He hee... so as you may be able to imagine it was the worst thing I could have possibly decided to do! Lunch breaks were the worst... because I knew I had to go back to that nightmare. Also because it was just me on my own... the pressure was on me the whole time to keep up and be able to do what he was asking me to do - which incidentally I wasn't capable of... I was so inept that he kept laughing at me! Monday night I read and re-read the handout he had given me... in the hope that something might actually stick in my brain. The last time I did maths was like 7 years ago.. so that was kinda bad. I really didn't want to go back, but I had paid so much money that I had to. In the end I am glad that I stuck it out because if I hadn't I would have felt like I was a failure and more thick than usual... So that's that! |
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